Mike’s Breakup Process Explained!
Finally, after weeks of keeping you all wondering how I did it, I have finally culminated a written word on how to get over a breakup in 2 weeks.
For those of you just going through a breakup, I know. 2 weeks is a lot of time! It might feel like forever, and it might feel like the world is going to end before those weeks are up. But trust me, it will be worth it! You will be a better person from this process, and you will learn a lot about yourself and the friends you have through it :).
Step 1: Accept
De’Nile is not just a river in Egypt - it’s also a very common emotional coping mechanism! The problem that most people don’t realize is that if you stay in De’Nile for too long, you wind up in the Dead Sea (♫ Womp-Womp ♫). Denial is great for the short term - everyone around you, even your best friends, can be fooled into thinking you are fine. But in the long term, the baggage you are pretending doesn’t exist will seep into many facets of your life without even realizing it. Do not cope with denial!
Step 2: Cope
Okay, now that we have established that denial is a bad coping mechanism, we must come to a humbling realization - we are human, we have to cope! The Marriam Webster definition defines the process of coping as “deal(ing) with and attempt(ing) to overcome problems and difficulties.” We need to deal with our problems - just not by ignoring them! We must find healthy ways to cope, it’s the only way. After my 2 month long relationship (I know it was short. It still hurt) I used one of the best coping mechanisms I could think of. I thought to myself “What is the opposite of ignoring the problem? Talking about it excessively!” For the next week, I was very social and instead of ignoring my issues, anytime I was asked how I was doing, I would be honest - I would tell them I was in pain. When you are vulnerable, good friends, even strangers can empathize with your pain and will be there for you! These are the people you want in your life. This is how you grow and become a better person, both through cultivating a better self and a better environment!
Step 3: Change Something
Just because you aren’t in denial doesn’t mean you have to think about your ex every waking second of your life! You need to change, otherwise you are going to think “I wish so-and-so was here” every time you go to your favorite restaraunt without that ex-special someone. After my terrible, agonizing breakup for instance, something deep inside compelled me to shave my 12-inch long man bun and to get my first tattoo. This is extreme and isn’t recomended, but it was exactly what I needed. Acquaintences failed to recognize me, and thus I was able to start over with a new identity and social personality. These things are important because they help you accept your new reality on your own terms.
I hope these three steps are helpful. Please email me with your situations as would love to hear about them :) me@michaelairola.com